Soul Mates…past lives…and moving on

 I read 2 books this week about past lives and soul mate connections.  “Many Lives Many Masters & Only Love Is Real” by Brian Weiss .

Both are about past lives and how we immediately recognize our soul mates when we meet them. We have many soul connections. Parents, siblings, friends, children and lovers . We travel in the same soul groups and meet over and over throughout our journey, constantly learning new lessons from our soul connections.  It made me think about a lot of things.  My marriage for one and why I never felt that connection to my husband after 15 yrs even though I loved him. It was different. Or the way I loved my father we definitely had past lives together. I believe he was my dad before maybe my brother and in one life definitely my mother . I can’t wait to see you again daddy on the other side and in another life.  My parents true love soul mates and they will be together again this I know.

We meet different people everyday and sometimes we meet the ones that we feel like we have known our whole lives . We have that feeling immediately . These are our soul connections. We are kindred spirits and we will meet again over and over.

This brings me to the only time I ever felt what I call ” love at first sight”.  When I met my ex. The minuet I saw him it was like somebody snapped their fingers in my face and said wakeup.  I felt something I never felt before. The reason this is so odd for me is because for one, I never ever have been that drawn to anyone I just met and two, he felt it too he told me. And three, I would never go for someone like him he was way younger than me. But we fell in love even though we both fought it at first, me more than him. It had to happen. I believe this now.  For some reason there were lessons I or we needed to learn. We always felt a deep connection to each other and we knew it. But he was so young 14 years younger than me that I felt guilt sometimes. However, I never have been loved so deeply or loved someone so deeply. When it ended I was left devastated. But I think if we were the same age the devastation would have been lesser for me .  For some reason I was supposed to look younger to attract him, I think, and we were suppose to fall in love which we did. And we lived together 2 years and then broke up. The years we spent together and the year and half since we broke up have completely change me as a person changed the way I feel about love and life. I realize he made me love on a  level I never experienced . I don’t know if  it was the same for him because of the age difference but I hope it was. We took that picture the night we met with my phone. We would break up shortly after that for 2 weeks . When I go to his place to bring him some things he left at my house and say goodbye “it was a pleasure meeting and knowing you but you should date someone you’re own age”. I will never forget the way he grabbed me and hugged me and said “I can’t explain it I feel like I am making a mistake”. I did too, but I said no this is the right thing. Then when I left I started crying as soon as I got in my car, so unlike me I couldn’t explain it we only dated a month at that time. So not like me.  We ended up back together in 2 weeks because of him pursuing me. We lived together for 2 years.

Excerpt from the book: “Only Love is Real.”

Sometimes your soulmate is willing and available.

He or she might recognize the passion and the

chemistry between you, the intimate and subtle bonds

that imply connections over many lifetimes. Yet he or she

may be toxic for you. It is a matter of soul development.

}If one soul is less developed and more ignorant than

the other, traits of violence, greed, jealousy, hatred, and

fear might be brought into the relationship. These

tendencies are toxic to the more evolved soul, even if

from a soulmate. Frequently rescue fantasies arise with

the thought, I can change him; I can help her grow. If he

does not allow your help, if in her free will she chooses

not to learn, not to grow, the relationship is doomed.

Perhaps there will be another chance in another lifetime,

unless he awakens later in this one. Late awakenings do

happen.

Sometimes soulmates decide not to get married

while incarnated. They arrange to meet, to stay together

until the agreed upon task is completed, and then to

move on. Their agendas, their lesson plans for the

entirety of this life, are different, and they do not want to

or need to spend all of this lifetime together. This is not a

tragedy, only a matter of learning. You have eternal life

together, but sometimes you may need to take separate

classes.

A soulmate who is available but unawakened is a

tragic figure and can cause you great anguish.

Unawakened means that he or she does not see life

clearly, is not aware of the many levels of existence.

Unawakened means not knowing about souls. Usually it

is the everyday mind that prevents awakening.

}We hear the excuses of the mind all the time: I’m too

young; I need more experience; I’m not ready to settle

down yet; you are of a different religion (or race, region, social status, intellectual level, cultural background, and so on). These are all excuses, for souls possess none of these attributes.

The person may recognize the chemistry. The attraction is definitely there, but the source of the chemistry is not understood. It is delusional to believe that this passion, this soul recognition and attraction, will

be easily found again with another person. You do not run into such a soul mate every day, perhaps only one or two more in a lifetime. Divine grace may reward a good heart, a loving soul.Never worry about meeting soul mates. Such meetings are a matter of destiny. They will occur. After the meeting, the free will of both partners reigns. What decisions are made or not made are a matter of freewill, of choice. The less awakened will make decisions based on the mind and all of its fears and prejudices.Unfortunately, this often leads to heartache. The more awakened the couple is, the more the likelihood of a decision based on love. When both partners are awakened, ecstasy is within their grasp.

I write a lot about him and what he did to me in the end. Will we meet again?  I think so and maybe next time I will know instinctively or somehow just know not to get involved with him . However, I need to forgive in this life first and that I am coming to terms with little by little.

He brought out the best and the worst in me. He made me feel the deepest love I have ever felt and hate for the first time in my life.I am still trying to decide what lesson or lessons I was supposed to learn from him. He couldn’t let me go as much as I couldn’t let him go .  I loved and hated him at the same time. I hope I never see him again. It would be too painful. We only live 30mins apart. I don’t look for him or check his fb page because I don’t want to know . But I think this is for the best because I do not want to ever see him again. He did love me deeply, yes he did. He also hurt me deeply and lied and was deceitful. All bad things so could he really be a soul mate?  Why do we have great chemistry with one or maybe two relationships in our lifetimes and almost no real chemistry with most of them? Is this what soul mates mean?  It’s not about being the best looking he certainly was not the best looking guy I have ever been with or the richest. It’s a feeling I just can’t explain. As much as I was drawn to him. There was always a feeling that something was not right. I always blamed it on age, but I know now that wasn’t the only thing. It was what is inside of him something that was not true and real. Was he just an undeveloped soul like the book said ?  Were we both? Or was he just a very good actor who used me for his own advantage a sociopath. That is what  my head tells me. My heart wants to believe differently.

I hope there is another soul mate in this lifetime for me because this can’t be it,  he can’t be it for me. Is this karma from something I did in a past life. Or just a lesson I needed to learn? Only time will tell,but can you ever truly in your heart move on from a true soul mate?

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11 Responses to “Soul Mates…past lives…and moving on”

  1. I also read those 2 books and I loved the messages that they passed to me regarding the soul mates and our life experience. I agree with your thoughts and I think that everybody has their soul mate, and sometimes you could have more than 1 soul mate. However, sometimes you could not find your soul mate in this life time, but could find it in another life. I believe that we are here to learn and to grow in spiritual way. Sometimes you could not find your soul mate because she or he are with another person to learn something as well and do her or his own spiritual evolution.
    However, I think you were lucky to find your soul mate and to live an intention love story. At least you have something to remember and to share and in spite of you are suffering and sad because it finished, you should smile because that love happenned in your life!
    And this happened for a reason. Now you need to move on and learn with experience.
    For sure, you learned something and will have also wonderful new love experiences.

    • Thank you Ulla. I believe the same thing.
      Now it is time for some happiness in whatever form that may come. I have mourned the end of that love for long enough : )

  2. Beautiful reflection…..I will do a soul-mate piece. Mine passed away (brain cancer). It was indeed a magical experience/quest of the journey. It has been 8 years now. You have visited my blog…now you see, for me I must serve and teach. I have more for you. The best in your lifetime is yet to come for you, brace yourself.

    • I am looking forward to reading more of your post.
      I can relate to losing your soul-mate. I watched my dad die. He and my mom were soul-mates and so in love even after 40+years together.
      The biggest challenge I have faced has been forgivness.Only this is the 1st time in my life I have felt this way. I am coming to terms with it and I believe that I have let go of the hate and most of the hurt finally. Writing has helped a lot.

      • That is terrific, you are taking action to move beyond. The writing will help, because you have switched your mind to serve others with your information and expression. You are also caught up in the grief cycle (of loss) that is what is making it even more difficult for you, you are grieving too. Until you are free of this completely, be aware of who you attract in to your life with that hateful low and slow energy. In other words, don’t even be tempted to start another relationship until those negative emotions are under control. Especially if we attract who we are. Get it?

      • Yes I do get it. thank you.

  3. I am truly blessed that you followed my blog. You have not been as ‘verbose’ as me, but you have said just as much! You have chosen a difficult yet wonderful pathway. Very similar to my own. I wish you all the best and pray God will help guide you to happiness as he is guiding me. Much love to you and your family.

  4. Reblogged this on Preconscious and commented:
    Maybe this is my tragedy: ‘A soulmate who is available but unawakened is a tragic figure and can cause you great anguish. Unawakened means that he or she does not see life clearly, is not aware of the many levels of existence. Unawakened means not knowing about souls. Usually it is the everyday mind that prevents awakening. We hear the excuses of the mind all the time: I’m too young; I need more experience; I’m not ready to settle
    down yet; …These are all excuses, for souls possess none of these attributes.
    The person may recognize the chemistry. The attraction is definitely there, but the source of the chemistry is not understood. It is delusional to believe that this passion, this soul recognition and attraction, will
    be easily found again with another person.’

  5. I would say I am a spiritual person, but is it possible for someone who is spiritually aware not to recognize their soul mate first?

    I only ask because there is a guy at work who stares at me strangely as if he knows me. His mannerisms and characteristics are quite similar to myself, I can see myself in him!. I would say he recognized me first but I didn’t recognize him. I’ve only started to take notice because of the way he looks at me.

  6. […] Source: Soul Mates…past lives…and moving on […]

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